Islam : A History

[Source : Class War, #90, Summer 2006, p.7] 

Islam means ’submission’. Submission of your whole existence to what your god decrees. It was thought up by the supporters of a seventh century Arabian gangster in order to consolidate their criminal organisation’s hold over the region. It is followed by over a billion people on this planet.

Muhammad was the sixth century equivalent of a travelling salesman or lorry driver. He drove his goods caravan and camel train across the Arabian peninsula, buying and selling cheap trinkets, dates, nuts, spices and fancy goods. He was born on April 20, 570 AD. Like all self-important nouveau-riche types, he embellished his family tree to claim a direct descendance to Abraham, the founder of the Jewish religion, of which Islam is a branch just like Christianity. However, despite the Arabs claiming to have invented arithmetic, Mo’s followers weren’t too clever at sums as his family tree goes back twenty-three generations to Abraham — approximately 2,700 years — meaning each father would had to have sired a baby boy at the age of over one hundred years. What is more plausible is that Muhammad was from a well-to-do business-class family.

Mo was brought up by a Bedouin wet-nurse in the desert, but lost both his parents young. He was raised by his uncle Abu Taib, a big business mogul in Mecca. He was given his own branch of the family business to take care of when he reached manhood. At 25 he married his 40-year-old boss and had some nippers. After she snuffed it, he started going into caves on his own and taking drugs. He was hallucinating all sorts of mad shit, seeing heaven and hell, going on fanciful journeys and even talking to the angel Gabriel! It was his ageing wife, in her late fifties, who first called Mo ‘prophet’. Whether she was humouring him, massaging his tender ego, or just having a laugh is of no matter as Mo decided that he liked the idea of being ‘god’s sole messenger on Earth’. Her cousin was a Christian and backed him up, probably to try and recruit him, but Mo considered himself the prophet, not Jesus.

Mo tried persuading everyone that he was in direct contact with the Judeo-Christian god. Most people ignored him, but gradually he gathered together a bunch of cranks who thought he was the top boy. Mo was frustrated by the Meccans’ adherence to idolatry and multitheism, and his group of hardcore Abrahamists were forced to flee to the Christian kingdom of Ethiopia for refuge. Mo however stayed in Mecca, until his family died, and his funds began to dry up. He then had another bout of bad dreams and hallucinations, this time involving a long journey to Jerusalem, and a discussion with Moses, Abraham and Jesus. He believed that he was the next prophet.

These delusions of grandeur were clearly going to his head, and surrounded like Elvis by a gaggle of yes-men and ‘friends’, he cut off all links with his family and moved to Yathrib, now called Medina. There, he and his gang started a protection-racket, whereby non-gang members, Jews, Christians and multitheists were taxed. Mo’s gang then became highwaymen, holding up caravans from Mecca. This racket grew until these armed thugs constituted his own private army. Many Meccans were murdered in cold blood by the criminals. After one slaughter, in Badr in 624, his flunkies declared their boss to be the son of god, or ‘god father’. All Jews were now expelled from Medina, and the remaining Medinans forced to acknowledge Mo’s rule. Mo, 52, then married his business partner and friend’s six year-old daughter Aisha, who became the third of his twelve wives. It’s a good job the News of the World wasn’t published in those days!

A protracted war broke out between the Medinan gang of Dirty Mo, and the Meccan gang led by Abu Sufyan. After The Battle of the Trench in 627, every Jewish man in the area was beheaded and the women and children raped and enslaved. Three years later Muhammad commanded an army of 10,000 men and forced the city of Mecca to bow to his rule, on pain of death. He now controlled all business in the Arabian peninsular. Mo snuffed it two years later, on June 8, 632, aged 62. Only his daughter Fatima from his first marriage survived him, and he refused to allow a woman to take over his gang.

A feud broke out between his son-in-law, Ali, and his adviser, Abu Bakr as to who should succeed Mo. Ali was defeated, and his supporters became Shi’at Ali (advocates of Ali). Abu Bakr took over Mo’s empire and began waging war against the Bedouins, Persians and the Byzantines.

Over the next two centuries, Dirty Mo’s unique mix of gangsterism and hero worship was forced upon the rest of the region — from north Africa to India, from Turkey to Madagascar. It grew into a ferociously superstitious cult, where any criticism of the legacy of Mo was considered blasphemous and punishable by death. His cult became known as ‘The Submission’ or ‘Islaam’ — and all free will and reason is replaced by the literal living of their lives by the Islamic FAQ, known as the Quran, which spells out the rules and regulations of being a proper Muhammad fan.

His followers are still divided between the Shi’ites (Ali) and the 85% of Moslems who call themselves Sunni. There is a huge tourism industry whereby cult members across the world visit Mecca to throw stones at it, the Haj pilgrimage. Unfortunately this is the point when fanatics tend to get a bit over-excited, resulting in stampedes and others disasters which have “blighted” the Haj in recent years.

All sorts of shit is banned in Muslim countries — homosexuality (punishment: death), masturbation (amputation), communism (death), and adultery, whereby any woman who so much as talks to another man may be punished.

This is the insane, sick belief system defended by liberals, and even some socialists today. Do you submit to it?

Islamic fundamentalists please note: Any fatwas as a result of this article should be sent to:

Class War
PO Box 467
London
E8 3QX
England

See also :

aNaRcHo AkBaR
Anarcho-Din
Iranian Anarchism
The Misery of Islam
The Muslim Anarchist Charter
The Muslim Postcolonial

convert this post to pdf.

Print This Post Print This Post | 7 Komentar

7 Komentar untuk “Islam : A History”

  1. Pada tanggal 21 Jul 2006 jam 2:04 am Yakoub

    Erm, I’m not sure I agree with your version of Islamic history, hilarious though it may be in parts. And there is lots I like about even quite traditional versions of Islam. By the way, did you know that, according to three of the four law schools, excessive masturbators will see their fingers give birth on judgement day!

  2. Pada tanggal 25 Nov 2006 jam 4:48 pm oky

    islam itu sangat indah dan menenteramkan, jika kita mau sedikit berfikir dan mau merasakan keindahannnya….

    saya mendukung punk & straigtedge dan anti kapitalisme. tapi saya tidak mendukung segala bentuk permusuhan terhadap sebuah agama terlebih agama islam…. nabi muhammmad adalah sebuah contoh teladan yang sempurna…. islam itu sangat indah…. namun banyak yg tidak bisa merasakan keindahannya bahkan umat islam sendiri karena kebanyakan tidak mengerti inti dari ajaran islam itu sendiri. jika punk punya solidaritas maka islam punya amar makruf nahi munkar yaitu bekerjasama dalam kebaikan…

    jangan menghakimi sesuatu hanyar berdasarkan pandangan sekilas, akan lebih bijak jika kita mau mempelajarinya terlebih dahulu. secara pribadi saya sangat mendukung anarchy tapi saya tidak mendukung segala bentuk hinaan terhadap sebuah agama. agama adalah dasar sebuah jiwa seseorang tanpa agama seseorang bagaikan sebuah perahu yg tak bernahkoda yg terombing-ambing di lautan kehidupan, dan islam adalah rahmatan lil alamin yaitu rahmat bagi seluruh umat manusia.

    salam pemberontakan saudaraku

    oky baztard
    seorang punk yg ingin berguna bagi orang lain dan ingin mengggapai ridlho-NYA

  3. Pada tanggal 28 Nov 2006 jam 7:33 pm Gerald M. Hansen

    You are absolutely right! Here’s a wonderful little fact: The most common name for a boy now born in Brussells is Mohammed! Although “Dirty Mo” (love that!)married a 6 year old, to his credit, he didn’t have sex with her until she was 9! Appearently, pedophilia is OK in the minds of the sufferers of the mental disorder known as liberalism! (As long as it is performed by one who is anti-Western/Christian.) (I had better go see the cathedrals of Europe before they are razed or converted into mosques.) Look, you guys in Europe had better wake up and kick these Satanic lunatics out of Europe, along with the liberal morons who would label you as racists, or it’s all over. Your daughters will be “circumcised” and compelled to don burkas (which means to compel, cover, smother, stifle, suppress). It is so tragic and ironic that the very ones that now seek to protect the presumed “rights” of the Islamo-facists who have invaded Europe (liberals) will certainly be the first ones to die at thier hands as required by the evil dictates of thier “religion” of death. Rise up, Europeans! Or capitulate, convert to the Satanic religion of Islam (as many did in Bosnia during the Ottoman reign to avoid death). Fight the Islamo-facists as well as thier stooges in politics and in the media! Refuse to capitulate! Kick Islamics out of Europe! Do it or die.

  4. Pada tanggal 06 Dec 2006 jam 6:17 pm dedi

    Islam is beautiful if u can feel it, just feel with ur heart… not ur anger… and mohammed is the perfect man…

  5. Pada tanggal 23 Dec 2006 jam 5:44 am elvis-fanatics

    I know that isalam is very beautiful you can feel it with your heart!

  6. Pada tanggal 23 Dec 2006 jam 5:44 am elvis-fanatics

    Very nice site

  7. Pada tanggal 25 Sep 2007 jam 2:05 am Karl Gustav

    I do agree to oppose capitalism. Destroy capitalism, because its made human being disarray. Your zeal made me burned into fired spirit.
    But.. i don’t agree at all, at your opinion / idea about Islam. Hey, its my religion. You and I, will take a risk of our deeds in front of our Creator. Someday you and i will dead. Its funny to hear that if someone already dead, he bear nothing or he will be a material again. Instead, he will responsible his deeds, just wait the judgement day.

    And the Creator (only idea?), you like it or not, The Creator exist. How come something exist without creation? Its fool, if we said that a car exist without creation, its made by accident? No! Are you made by accident? No! You were made by purpose, a purpose to live. Just ask your heart and brain..

    And all indignity comments about Prophet Muhammad, its only a shit!

    Revolution against capitalism

Berikan komentar

XHTML: Anda dapat menggunakan tag-tag ini: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Trackback URI | RSS Komentar